Loving Exiles

Thank you for reading this sermon from Christ Fellowship. I hope and pray that this sermon will be a blessing of grace and truth to you. With that said, let me encourage you not to use this sermon as a replacement for your local church. Christ Jesus did not establish his Church simply for us to consume content. Instead, He calls us to be part of a real, covenant family.

I want to start with a question, and I want to give you some time to think about it. What do you need to be happy? You personally… Or if you already consider yourself to be happy, what might make you happier? 

Most of the time, we think of different circumstances. More money… more free time… less stress… better health. And there’s nothing wrong with those things. 

But the things we think will make us happy usually don’t. Every research study on the topic of happiness has come to the same conclusion. People with strong relationships are happier, even if their immediate circumstances aren’t that great. 

Even in some of the poorest countries, as long as basic needs are met, you’ll find some extremely happy people. And most of that happiness is linked to healthy relationships. 

God designed us that way and He has some things to say about it. 

[8] Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind.  

At first glance, these seem like random virtues, but there is a pattern. The first and last virtues are focused on the mind. Love stands at the center of the list, linked on both sides to virtues of the heart. Mind, heart, love, heart, mind. 

All five of them are social. They tell us how we should relate to one another. And the pattern suggests that love is both a matter of the head and the heart. How we think and feel about other people affects our ability to love them. 

First is unity of mind, which speaks to our common ground in the truth. It’s not the same thing as uniformity. We don’t all have to agree on politics or preferences or secondary theological issues. We may have different cultures or even speak different languages, but we share common ground in the Gospel.  

One of the things I love about this church is that we understand the difference here between unity and uniformity. We have a lot of differences, but we respect and value each other because of our shared faith. 

Second is sympathy, which is the ability to enter into someone else’s experience… to feel what they feel. The Apostle Paul describes this as rejoicing with those who rejoice and weeping with those who weep. It’s an important part of any meaningful relationship. 

A tender heart is closely related to sympathy. It’s compassion, the impulse pushing us to move toward hurting people. 

A humble mind is one that has the ability to put other people first. Instead of being preoccupied with self, it makes room for others. This is important, because otherwise we can be so consumed by our own thoughts and feelings that we won’t have space for other people. 

And at the center is brotherly love, something that only flourishes in the midst of these other virtues. This verse is a great lens by which to evaluate our most important relationships. And together, they set the stage for verse 9: 

[9] Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing.  

This verse is a summary of the ethical teaching Peter had heard from Jesus. Treat others the way you want to be treated. Love your enemies. Pray for those who persecute you. Forgive if you expect to be forgiven. We will reap what we sow. If you live by the sword, you will die by it.  

In other words, love is a posture of nonretaliation. It seeks to bless instead of curse. It breaks the never-ending cycle of violence in this world, trusting that God will handle the justice part.  

And such love will be rewarded because it mirrors the love Christ has shown to us, which was an undeserved blessing. 

Peter continues: 

[10] For “Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit; 

This verse and the two that follow are a direct quote from Psalm 34, a Psalm of David. We also find a lot of similar wisdom in Proverbs, which was mostly written by David’s son, Solomon. 

Those two men were kings during the golden age of Israel. They were wealthier than anyone in the Bible who lived before or after them. 

And what does David say? If you want to love life and see good days… what must you do? Get rich? No… Find the perfect spouse? No… Find the perfect job? No… Eat, drink, and be merry? No…  

David says, if you want to LOVE LIFE and see GOOD DAYS… watch your mouth. That’s the first thing he says you need to do. Watch your mouth. 

In other words, you’re not going to be happy without healthy relationships, and healthy relationships are all about good communication. Be kind and honest to each other. 

This isn’t hyper-spirituality either. It’s verifiable science. Money, success, and fame do not make people happier. Every study ever done on happiness has concluded that strong relationships are the most important factor.  

And that means how we talk to each other matters. Watch your mouth. Second, David says: 

[11] let him turn away from evil and do good; let him seek peace and pursue it. 

Notice all the action verbs in this verse. Turn away. Do good. Seek peace. Pursue it. 

Seek and pursue are both hunting words. No one accidentally kills a trophy buck. You prepare and plan for it. And unless you get some sort of divine favor on your first ever hunt, like someone I know in this room who will go unnamed, you’re going to have to be patient. 

In the same way, peace in this world doesn’t come easy. You have to go after it—through hard conversations, humble repentance, and active forgiveness… choosing not to bring up old offenses. 

The Bible never really talks about love as a feeling. It may come with some feelings. But far more often, the Bible talks about love as intentional actions. 

If you want to be happy, it’s going to take work. Hard work. You’re not going to drift into it. Humanity is drifting into chaos and sin and death. We are not naturally drifting into holiness and peace and unity. 

A garden doesn’t drift into order and beauty and fruitfulness. It drifts into weeds. 

Relationships don’t drift into peace and happiness. They drift into misunderstanding and hurt. 

We won’t get peaceful homes or a healthy church by accident. We’re going to have to work at it. A change of mind and a change of heart rooted in the Gospel. A faith that expresses itself in love, as Paul says in Galatians 5. 

Look at verse 12, our last verse today: 

[12] For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and his ears are open to their prayer. But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.” 

This verse reminds me of Aaron’s benediction that we talked about a few months ago, where the Lord’s face being turned toward you is a blessing.  

But in this case, the face of the Lord might be a blessing or a curse. The Lord looks with favor upon the righteous, but He looks with anger upon the wicked. 

Believers sit in an interesting position, because if we are honest about our own sin, we know that we are not shining examples of all the virtues Peter mentions here.  

I do not approach my relationships every day with respect and humility and sympathy and tenderness. I don’t watch my mouth. And I don’t always put in the work to make things right. 

But we also know that Christ is the only One who truly and perfectly exemplifies love and compassion and humility. 

At the cross, Jesus was surrounded by people who mocked His pain and questioned His identity. They spit at him, they cursed him… and His response was not to call down fire from heaven but to pray for them… ‘Father, forgive them.’ 

And so, our best hope is not that we’ve mastered these virtues, but that Christ has. He loved His enemies all the way to the cross. Because He took the curse we deserve, we now receive the blessing He earned. And by His Spirit, He begins to shape us into the kind of people Peter describes here. 

And I would encourage you to think carefully about what that means for you personally.  

The Word of God makes it clear – if you want to love life and see good days, then you need to work on your relationships. Marriage, friendships, siblings, coworkers… 

You’re not going to drift into better relationships, which means you aren’t going to drift into happiness. And most importantly, this is what God designed us to do. It’s what brings Him glory. It’s the kind of love He demonstrated at the cross. 

And as a church, I especially want to encourage us to keep pursuing people who are hurting or marginalized in some way… the people around us who are starving for community. Those are the people Jesus often went looking for. 

And here’s the beauty of it. They don’t just need us. We need them. God often does His best work in the middle of difficult relationships – in both people. And there’s a tremendous amount of joy involved when people are drawn into Gospel community. 

Let’s pray together that God would continue shaping us into that kind of church, with this kind of love Peter describes – unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind.